Family Pictures

Emotional Ties

It's been awhile since I have posted anything. Sarah is 5 months now and I'm wondering where the time has gone. She has grown so much since we took her home and her personality has definitely shown itself. She has slept good from day one. After she got back up to her birth weight in the 1st two weeks we stopped waking her up to eat and let her wake us up instead. She immediatly started to sleep 4 hours at a time, then 5, then 6, and now we are at 10 hours!! She is very laid back and happy almost all the time unless she is hungry or tired. She smiles a lot and loves to be played with. The hardest part about being a mommy is the emotional ties you have to your child. I worry all the time about her health and well being. I worry that I don't get to spend enough time with her because I have to work. I worry about having to put her in daycare in a few months versus having a babysitter. I've been a step-mom for a long time and there are emotional ties associated with that, but there is nothing like having one of your own or one that is all yours that you are completely responsible for. Even though there is heartache associated with being a parent, it's the best thing I have ever done and wouldn't change it for the life of me. I look forward to worrying about my kids for the rest of my life. Another cool thing about having baby Sarah is that she has brought our family together full circle. Although Avery is not blood related to me, she is blood related to her sister, which is blood related to me and her dad. Sarah ties us all together and we have all felt the affects of that in a very positive and strong way. I see the love Avery has for her sister and it makes me so happy! I watch her daddy love that baby just like I've been watching him love Avery for years and that makes me so happy. I think God puts certain people in our lives for a reason. For example, he put John and Avery in my life a long time ago to give me a kind of love I had never known. I never wanted kids until Avery came into my life and changed my mind. Now he has put another person in my life that has further changed me and my life forever. Life is so amazing!!!